Your father just had a stroke. The hospital says he'll need a nursing home, maybe for good. Your mother is still at home and worried about how she'll pay the bills. Someone mentions Medicaid, someone else mentions a trust, and a friend says to call a lawyer right away. Which kind of lawyer, and for what?
That's where an elder law attorney comes in. This guide explains what they do and how to choose one. It's general information, not legal advice; laws vary by state.
What an elder law attorney does
The National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys describes its focus as improving legal services for older adults and people with disabilities4. In practice, elder law attorneys commonly help with:
- Long-term care planning. How to pay for home care, assisted living or a nursing home, including nursing home costs.
- Medicaid. Eligibility, the look-back period, spousal protections, applications and appeals.
- Incapacity planning. A durable power of attorney, health care proxy and advance directives.
- Guardianship. When a parent can no longer decide and no power of attorney exists, or defending against an unneeded guardianship. See guardianship.
- Wills, trusts and probate. Including special needs trusts for a disabled family member.
- Elder rights. Nursing home discharges, financial exploitation, and age discrimination.
When to call one
You don't need a lawyer for every question. But these situations usually justify a consultation:
- A nursing home stay looks long-term and your parent has savings, a home or a spouse at home.
- Your parent has no power of attorney and is starting to lose capacity. Acting early, while they can still sign, often avoids guardianship.
- A Medicaid application was denied, or a transfer penalty was assessed. See Medicaid denial appeals.
- You suspect financial abuse. See elder financial abuse.
- Family members disagree about care, money or who should be in charge.
- Your parent wants to give away assets or add a child to a deed. These moves can cause Medicaid and tax problems.
Elder law vs. estate planning attorneys
An estate planning attorney focuses on passing on property at death: wills, trusts and taxes. An elder law attorney looks at the whole later-life picture, including how your parent will pay for care while living. Many lawyers do both. The difference matters most when long-term care is likely, because a plan written only to avoid probate may not account for Medicaid rules. For background on probate, see the California courts' plain-language guide5, which explains how an estate may need to go through probate even when there's a will.
How to find one
- NAELA's directory. The National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys has a find-a-lawyer search6.
- Certified Elder Law Attorneys. The National Elder Law Foundation is the only national organization accredited by the American Bar Association to certify lawyers in elder and special needs law1. Certification isn't required, but it signals experience.
- Your Area Agency on Aging. It can point you to legal programs for older adults7.
- Your state bar. Most state bars help people find a lawyer by practice area and check that a license is in good standing.
- People you trust. Hospital social workers, care managers and friends who've been through it.
Questions to ask in the first meeting
- How much of your practice is elder law? And how many cases like ours do you handle each year?
- Who is your client? Usually it's your parent. The lawyer must follow your parent's wishes and keep their confidences, even if you're paying.
- How do you bill? Hourly or a set price for a defined project, like a Medicaid application? What's included? Ask for a written agreement.
- Who will do the work? The lawyer, an associate or a paralegal?
- How long will it take? And how will you keep us updated?
- What are the risks? Of each option you're recommending, including tax and Medicaid effects.
How to prepare
A first meeting goes better when you bring the facts. Gather:
- A list of assets and income. Bank and investment statements, retirement accounts, Social Security and pension amounts.
- The deed to the home and any mortgage information.
- Existing documents. Wills, trusts, powers of attorney, health care directives.
- Insurance. Long-term care, life insurance and health plans.
- Medical information. Diagnoses and what kind of care is needed or likely.
- A list of questions. Write down what worries you most.
Our guide to managing a parent's finances has a fuller checklist. It also helps to write a one-page summary: your parent's age, health, where they live now, who helps them, and what you're hoping the lawyer can do. Lawyers can give better advice in a first meeting when they don't have to piece the story together from scattered papers. If siblings are involved, agree beforehand on who will attend and who will be the main contact, so the lawyer gets one consistent set of facts.
Your parent's role
Because your parent is the client, the lawyer will usually want to meet with them, sometimes alone. That isn't a sign of distrust; it's how the lawyer confirms that your parent understands and agrees with the plan, and that no one is pressuring them. If your parent has memory problems, the lawyer will assess whether they have capacity to sign documents. Capacity can vary by decision and by day, so schedule meetings at your parent's best time of day.
If you're helping manage your parent's money, the CFPB's guides for agents and trustees explain your duties to act in their interest, keep their money separate and keep records8.
If you're already in a crisis
Many families first call a lawyer after a hospital stay, when a discharge planner says a parent can't go home. That's a stressful time to make legal decisions, but it's not too late. Tell the lawyer up front what's urgent: a discharge date, a Medicaid deadline, a notice from a nursing home, or a bank account you think someone is draining. A good elder law attorney will sort tasks into what must happen this week and what can wait.
In the first days, the most useful steps are often simple. Confirm whether your parent has a valid power of attorney and health care proxy, and where the originals are. If your parent can still understand and sign, the lawyer may prepare these right away. Gather recent statements so the lawyer can see what your parent owns. Don't move money, retitle the house or pay off a family member's debts before talking to the lawyer, because some transfers can trigger Medicaid penalties or tax problems. Our guide to hospital discharge planning covers the medical side of the same week.
Talking to your parent about seeing a lawyer
Some parents bristle at the idea of a lawyer. They may hear it as a sign that you think they're failing, or that you're after their money. It helps to frame the meeting around what your parent wants: staying at home as long as possible, protecting a spouse, making sure their wishes are followed, or keeping the family from fighting later. Offer to go with them, but respect it if they want to meet the lawyer alone for part of the time.
Bring up concrete examples instead of general worries. "If you were in the hospital and couldn't talk, who would you want making decisions?" is easier to answer than "You need to plan." Our guide to when a parent refuses help has more ideas for these conversations.
Working with a lawyer over time
Elder law planning isn't a one-time event. Documents should be reviewed after major changes: a new diagnosis, the death of a spouse, a move to another state, a divorce or remarriage, or a big change in savings. Laws and Medicaid rules change too. Ask the lawyer how often they recommend a review and whether they'll keep copies of signed documents.
Keep a simple file at home listing the lawyer's name and contact information, where the original documents are, and who holds copies. Share it with the person named as agent or executor. That way, when a crisis comes, nobody has to search for papers.
Free and low-cost legal help
Older Americans Act legal services programs, about 1,000 providers nationwide, help older adults with public benefits like Medicaid, Medicare and Social Security, advance directives, guardianship, housing, eviction and elder abuse2. They're targeted to older people with economic or social needs2. Legal Services Corporation funds legal aid programs nationwide for low-income people3. Your Area Agency on Aging, through the Eldercare Locator, can connect you7.
Red flags
- Pressure to sign quickly or to buy a financial product like an annuity from the same person.
- Promises that Medicaid will definitely pay or that all assets can be protected.
- A seminar pitch followed by a one-size-fits-all trust package.
- Unclear billing or no written agreement.
- Excluding your parent from decisions about their own money.
An example
When Marisol's father moved into a nursing home after a stroke, her mother worried she'd lose the house. An elder law attorney met with both parents, reviewed their assets, explained the spousal protections in their state, and filed the Medicaid application. She also updated her mother's power of attorney and will so that a future crisis wouldn't leave the family without a plan. This is an illustration; outcomes depend on state law and individual facts.
